Suicide prevention: the effort starts with you

Published April 21, 2010
By Tech. Sgt. Lee A. Osberry Jr.
Minot Air Force Base Public Affairs

MINOT AIR FORCE BASE, N.D. -- "Mr. Smith, there's been an accident. Your son was found in his home deceased with what appears to be a self-inflicted gunshot. We are deeply sorry for your loss and the Air Force is here to help you in any way possible."

The father lets out a loud shriek and with tears streaming cries, "Why...why did this happen? I just talked to him yesterday."

The scenario above is one of the most difficult situations in which commanders may find themselves. The universal questions always come down to "Why?" and "Could it have been prevented?"

Unfortunately one may never know all the answers, but there are usually signs if someone close to you is thinking of harming himself or herself. Airmen should be aware of these signs and do what they can to detect these signs in their wingmen. Usually, the person doesn't necessarily want to die but is looking to stop whatever is causing the pain.

"He seemed to be a little down in the dumps, but who wouldn't be if their wife just cleaned out the house with the kids and left? I know he'd been drinking a lot more after work since then and kept muttering, 'I hate life,' the past few days."

A drastic change in behavior or mood is usually the most obvious and initial signs of trouble. A person may be unaware of another's personal issues at home but deterioration in one's attitude, dress and appearance is a hint something is awry.

"Social withdrawal, poor hygiene, plus drug and/or alcohol abuse are red flags" said Senior Airman Ashley Albright, 5th Medical Group suicide prevention monitor. "Other common signs are eating or sleeping difficulty, talking about suicide, unusual risk taking, a sense of hopelessness, and relationship problems," she said.

"It's my fault. I approved his leave because he said he needed time away from all of this and to be alone. He felt like his working all the time was the reason his wife left. He just bought that new rifle and said he needed time to clear his head. He seemed really calm given everything that just happened. I was going to ask him, but I didn't want to give him any ideas."

A common misconception about suicide is that you could put the idea in a person's head.

"This is false. If you have a concern about it, and they have shown other signs, they've likely thought about it," said Master Sgt. John Jeziorske, 5th Medical Group Mental Health Clinic flight chief. "Anything to help the individual communicate about this shared concern is great."

According to a report from Air Combat Command there were 46 total force suicides in 2008 and 2009 across the Air Force. This includes active duty, reserve, and civilian personnel.

"He called me last night at 2 a.m. and said I could have his prized golf clubs since he wasn't going to be using them much longer. He said I'd always been a great friend and he was leaving tomorrow. I assumed he had just been drinking, since he was calling that early. I had no idea....I thought only crazy people would do that, not Smitty."

One of the most immediate ways people can make an impact in a person's life is to recognize the signs and act.

"Knowing the resources ahead of time, removing any lethal means, staying with them and asking them directly are critical," Albright said.

Actively listening to the person, highlighting the positive reasons for them to live, and most importantly getting them to Mental Health or the closest hospital are all ways someone can help in breaking the "tunnel vision."

"Suicide is truly a permanent solution to a temporary problem," said Albright. "Although we can give you the number of completed and attempted suicides throughout the past decade, there is no way we can give how many times someone took the opportunity to listen, care and a life was saved."

Lighting the way to life